Infinite

I’m slowly stitching back my severed nerves, carefully, serrated edge dripping through my hands. have you ever been so [rage] you try to rip your shirt off at the collarbone? knees that topple to the ground, a controlled demolition. it [hurts].

You feel like imploding, collapsing inwards, [grief] is ripping chunks out of muscles again. why do you keep making me [sad] when it has been so long! it isn’t fair, when I try so hard, long, forever, to get it right. it isn’t right. stop [hurting] me.

I’m poking around for the [happy] in a rainy day, the [joy] in a dismissive gesture, the [love] in an empty house. I feel a [d]rag when you’re fl[ying].